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"Yesterday I talked to myself, when the night was reaching the dawn
All my life, I kept climbing the heights of my soul to meet the enemy at the
top,
Finally, I went there to challenge him, but I kicked my own self down"
Özdemir Asaf
 I
dared to begin this article by referring to the famous poem of Ozdemir Asaf.
However, my fondness of these phrases don’t make me as wise as the poet, who
wrote it. Even the poet himself, who is capable of writing such a poem, might
not be totally able to digest the wisdom praised in his own writings and make
that wisdom inherent to his everday life.
We are the vagabonds on the Road to Divine Love. It is true that we spend most
of our time showing off our wisdom in order to catch the admiring looks of
people and charm the ones, with whom we want to make Love in the most mundane
way. Still we can call the main route of our lives "strange curves of a river
that is expected to run into the sea, someday, sometime". Surely we are
people, who love communication. Members of the Lonely Hearts Club Band and Us,
- Searchers of the Soul's Way-, these are the two main groups, which keep the
Internet alive. Give us a mail-group! Next day we will start to share with
each other words of wisdom written by famous thinkers, gurus, - people, who
seem to have reached the peace we are seeking to find in our souls-.
Please don’t miss that I am not mentioning of THEM – the crowd I watch from a
distance - but of US - the crowd I belong to-. I am not against making references to other peoples' wisdom in our
speeches. A person, who reads the poem that I put at the top of this article
and found a piece of wisdom in it, is a person with whom I can begin to talk
by passing some useless intorductory sentences. Well, the road is long and our
targets are aggressive!!! Who wants to loose valuable time by talking to
"ordinary" people instead of the ones, who know what you mean…
 We
are lost sheeps on the dusty path of "Developing Awareness of Our
Divine-Self". When we entered this path, we were all fed up with adds and TV
gingles that tell us what happiness is and never recall how much it costs. We
were looking for alternative realities. But now our feet are dirty and
worn-out and our cloths are not tick enough to cover our weakness. Although
non of us confess to others that this path was tougher than we thought, we all
like to find people of our kind to have a nice, refreshing chat. Exchanging
wise sentences that are borrowed from The Ones Who Succeeded, helps us to feel
wishful and strong again. Such exhanges also serve us like an identity card
that shows others, how mature, refined, etc. etc. etc. we are.
We wander from one Reiki Group to another Yoga Center. We eat natural and
preferably vegetarian meals. We talk words of wisdom when we find another
person of our kind. This is how we feel ourselves secure and preserved from
the banalities of ordinary people!!!
Our will is good; ''Finding the Truth''.. The tools we use – Reiki, Yoga,
Healthy Eating Habits, Mantras - are all acceptable and useful, as they are
valuable practices developed by human wisdom over hundreds of years. But the
mind that applies these practices is as ordinary and shallow as the daily life
we try to escape.
What is the difference between two people below? I don’t mean the cover, but
the main drive behind their talks;
– The coquette calling her friend ''You wouldn't belive Cherie!! I saw a new
boutique in XXX Avenue. Do you remember the shirts Nellie bought from Milan
last year at incredibly high prices? They are sold there with 50% discount''
- The "Seeker of the Truth'' calling his friend "C'mon Buddy, let these weird
Zen-Sunni practices aside.. These are only palliative solutions. I discovered
a new Zimbabwean Guru, who teaches 1000 years old practices that help you to
capture the essence of Chi''
Am I criticising the followers of centuries-old spiritual practices? No not at
all… I am the follower of similar paths. My position is not a critic from
outside. I rather try to warn people against the silly illusions we create
about a spiritual hyerarchie, which I also see inside of me.
 We
classify people as having higher or lower awareness, just by looking at their
images. If the basic need is to look "special and important" and the manner is
"trying to position ourselves at the top of others" neither the quality of
tools nor the meaning of the target mean anything.
We send nice proverbs to eachother such as "The ones who judge others, will
experience the harshest judgement!" But the very next moment we begin to judge
people we don’t like; "Don’t mention me about his Reiki certificates! Who the
hell is he? Before two years he even didn't know the name of Tao! Now he is
trying to challenge me with his deep knowledge on spiritualism"
Non of us experienced Perfection yet. We only try to simulate the illusion we
have in our minds to look perfect. While imitating the perfect look we have in
our minds, we mostly fail to see our real self. We miss the essence that is
THERE. We skip the power of our real SELF. Our real standing-point to begin
the next phase of our journey.
We are what we are. Only way of extending our reality is to experience our
real self to the fullest and see the pro's and con's of our choices. Am I
lazy? Am I full of prejudice? Am I helplessly dependent on material
belongings? Than why should I deny what I am? There is no other way for me to
accept my existing reality. If I am not happy with what I have at hand, than I
can begin to work on it on a realistic way. I can try to understand the basic
drives underlying the behaviour I don’t like and try to change the way used to
live up to now.
 We
are what we are, not the person we are pretending to be. Even if we can
disguise our weakness, our fear of being incomplete, deep inside we know that
we have questions to ask to ourself and have the courage to hear the honest
answers. Not the answers we prefer to hear… The polarity we create in ourself;
the one we really are and the one we pretend to be, is the main barrier for us
to feel ourselves COMPLETE.
We may not be perfect yet, but we can be honest. First to ourselves and to
other people. Because we climb the hills of spiritual awareness to reach
OURSELF.
"Yesterday I talked to myself, when the night was reaching the dawn
All my life, I kept climbing the heights of my soul to meet the enemy at the
top,
Finally, I went there to challenge him, but I kicked my own self down"
Özdemir Asaf
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